My Perfect Self

The waves kiss the shore bringing up beautiful shells;  some pristine, some cracked, others broken. I discard the broken ones looking for the perfect ones. The broken ones fill the parts of me to attempt to make me whole.

A mosaic of pieces reflecting my soul but I just want to be one perfect shell that is whole and complete. I am a collective of all of the fragmented pieces of myself.

I try hard to sift the imperfection so I can show the world my perfect self.  But what or who is perfect? The most perfect that I can be is when I realize the imperfections and embrace them not making one better than the other.

There is no perfect because we are evolving and we are human which shifts moment to moment.
Be Still and know that I AM God.

When the hermit crab outgrows it’s shell, it doesn’t argue. It doesn’t try to change into a butterfly 🦋. 
It simply finds a new one that fits him better.

Device Adiction

27 Funny But Thought-Provoking Images Of How Smartphones Have ...

Who me?  

Not me…. for sure, NOT ME!

I come from an era where I was sent next door to borrow a cup of sugar or up the street to pick up something from the store. Most of the time it was for a pack of cigarettes for my mom starting at the age of 10 with a note in hand, granting me permission to buy them.

We talked on the phone, played kick the can, hide and seek, dodgeball, jumped rope etc, all outside. At night We played bingo and Gin Rummy, built forts, played Candyland, Monopoly and drank Coca Cola before we knew it was bad for you.

We watched T.V. but we had to get up to change the channel.  We watched things like Donna Read, Dick Van Dike, I love Lucy, The Flintstones and I even watched Jack La Laine before I knew that would become my profession. Or maybe he was the beginning influencer for me since I could relate to his junk food craving addictions. 

Jack LaLaine, my mom would exercise to jack LaLaine! | My ...

 We had a stereo and played albums.  Our favorites were Sergeant Pepper by the Beatles, The Monkeys, Fleetwood Mac, Elvis Presley, The Doobie Brothers, Chicago, The Beach Boys amongst others.  We took pictures on a camera, or disposables and got photos back by going to the store to pick them up after they were developed. My favorite was Poloroid pictures for instant gratification. Oh the thousands of photos we still have even though I make a point of purging every so often. Thank God for storage on the computer for that.

Sgt Pepper's at 50 – the greatest thing you ever heard or just ...

We traveled in the car with only a map and a dime to make a phone call in a phone booth, just in case we had an emergency.  We pulled the window down if we were lost and asked for directions.  We talked to people and we met people at the grocery store, the post office, standing on the street corner if we took the bus or in line waiting for something.  There was no online dating, we met happenstance or through a friend of a friend. We wrote in journals and sent notes, postcards and wrote in cursive. We had encyclopedias on our shelf and we looked things up that we wanted to learn. God, I’m sounding ancient.

Wine On A Dime: In Search Of The Cheapest Wine In Jax
(We all need wine right now, we know that!)

3 of my 4 kids have a memory book with all of their most treasured papers, report cards, pictures and drawings.  My 4th is still waiting for hers.  I PROMISE IT’S COMING RENEE!

My kids had limited television time and they played the same way we did;  device free, outside, went to camp where they learned how to work a farm, milk the cows, churn butter, ride horses, swim, play horseshoe and cook and set the table.  Freshman year was the first time we got a phone for our kids and it was mostly for me because they said I was always late even though I prided myself on being a responsible mom. However with 4 kids under the age of 6 someone inevitably decided to poop, throw up, have a mini tantrum etc and I had to haul them all in the car when someone needed to be somewhere because I couldn’t leave them at home alone.  By then, I’m sure it was because I had started back to work  inbetween hauling one to a game and the other to dance or some other activity. There were no games on the phone, no texting, no camera.  There wasn’t social media to distract them or bullying and comparing themselves online and no worry of seeing child pornography or tapping into sites that were X rated. AIM started in middle school when instant messaging was the big hooray.

Image result for first flip phone

Somewhere in grammar school Nintendo, game boy, xbox took front and center and the T.V. Shows got more inappropriate in content.  Jurasik Park was the big movie my kids watched which was PG 13. Woo hoo, and then of course all hell broke loose and I was constantly saying put your phone down, turn off the t.v. The shows were out of control in content but  it was a losing battle.

I don’t have to tell you what happened next as we’re all living it.  Like it or not, we are a product of technology and we must know it to survive in this world but how do we continue to grow and learn when a punch of the button can tell you anything you want to know. In so many ways it has made things easier and better and yet there is always a flip side.  One truth is the world will be unrecognizable in the future and we will need to  do damage control for sure. You can diagnose yourself over the internet, fix a toilet, learn to make a bomb, build whatever you want, resolve a math problem etc. Sometimes it’s great and other times you may decide to order a medication to treat something only to find out later it wasn’t that at all and you’ve made your situation worse. 

The cash register dispels the exact change you should be given and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had the wrong change come back even still.  No one knows how to count anymore, let alone think.  People talk on their phone to the person they are sitting with, or to someone else while the other person is also talking to someone else.  And then there are the games that can be played anytime of day. 

It’s addictive and studies show the colors of our phones and computers are designed to keep us engaged playing on the part of our addictive brain center where dopamine is released, signaling pleasure. Adds on our newsfeed are constantly bombarding us to buy something. These days all new homes have smart lights and technology and no one I know is smart enough to know how to turn them on or off for that matter.  You can heat your house from a distance, and it goes on and on.  

I have used technology just enough so that it serves me and I know enough to be dangerous. I do use a scheduling system to make appointments and email of course but in general, it’s not how I want to spend my time. Nor could I help as many clients in a day if I had to do all of this technology. My work is to support people in disengaging from all of these devices that have been  bombarding them, through life coaching, personal training, yoga, qigong, tai chi, massage, craniosacral therapy, reiki, music medicine and meditation. I have an assistant to handle all of my paperwork, flyers, putting out my newsletter after writing it, restocking supplies, ordering etc. I AM MORE GRATEFUL FOR THAT THAN EVER BEFORE!

The Essential Yoga Poses for Beginners | Easy yoga poses, Workout ...

Well, that is B.C.  That would be Before Covid.

B.C. I had a flow like a lot of us in our work with systems in place to keep me hands on so I could stay at a high frequency.  This fully embodied presence allowed me to stay connected to source so I could be available moment to moment to support others in finding their truths and working towards their highest potential each moment.  My day was a walking meditation if you will and in between clients, I made sure that I got my own practice of meditation, Yoga, hiking etc in daily.  


Next thing I knew my adult kids had moved in because it was safer at home and I was at the mercy of them to try to figure out how to learn this technological world.  My assistant and I had meetings on Zoom through shared screen but to even get me up and running on that platform was a challenge. Everyday was hair raising and trying and my relationship with my son and daughter was strained and tense. 

They would constantly attempt to teach me how to use the computer, turn off notifications, use Google Docs, bluetooth pairing, editing, music, mail chimp my new newsletter carrier which we moved from Constant Contact (no clue still why), make invites, create flyers, learning to upload youtube videos and vimeo, recordings, pairing with F.B. and instagram, paypal and venmo. Argh!

Everyday, I would forget what they told me (even though we wrote it down and made training videos) and we would end up in a screaming match right before I needed to teach and I would be in near tears. Now, it was me who didn’t feel safe. The  frustration for them was that these were such basic things that I hadn’t learned and they couldn’t imagine how I couldn’t get it.  Simple things like copying a URL was something I didn’t know how to do.  I would hear “Google it” several times a day and I would try, I really would and I would screw up and it was so embarrassing.  I slowly started getting it and then there were questions on platforms they couldn’t really help me with because they don’t know the platform and they have been busy trying to figure things out themselves working online.  One of their biggest beefs has been living in this technological world without a choice and although necessary, they don’t always love it either.

Sometimes I sit for hours on one little thing trying to fix a problem or understand it and finally do get it fixed but can’t remember what I did to fix it. But the main thing is I figured it out and I feel quite accomplished, although spent. I’m rarely asking them for help anymore but I’m mostly online when I’m not doing a livestream session,  class or 6 ft back from a client.  

(teaching a zoom class)

I’ve been making more videos and sending out emails to keep clients sane during these uncertain times.  If you don’t see me setting up for an online session or class, you will see me pecking away on the computer.  It takes about 6 times longer for set up and breakdown, adjusting lighting, rooms, moving furniture, adding props, getting the light ring going, helping someone get their video on etc., than it normally does. By the time I would start a session, I was a bag of nerves but now I’m getting  a little more confidence each time, but I’ve been physically and mentally exhausted.  

So now, I am addicted to my devices.  YES, I admit it;  I AM AN ADDICT.  I AM DEVICE ADDICTED…. Little ole me!  YIKES, one of my biggest pet peeves and here I am. The tides have turned and the “kids” are constantly saying “Mom, turn that off and take a break, “Don’t you want to visit with your family?” I just say “of course I do, in a minute”.

I suppose one of my next blogs will be Breaking Device Addiction.  

Image result for quotes about technology addiction

Beauty All Around Me

Found hiking in Redwood Regional Park Oakland Ca.

Time stands still in moments of beauty
A gift from mother earth.

The sun radiates from the parting clouds while light ricochets
capturing light and darkness in synchronicity.

Colors and silhouettes reflecting light
seeing our own true colors of love and neutrality where oneness is found. 

If I sit still long enough the beauty is all around me  
I don’t have to do anything…. just open my eyes to see and feel these truths.

Critters come out to play, to greet the morning sun as my animals go wild with delight… so much fun on the horizon.

Today I choose to be one of my animals who give so much and ask for so little.

Today I Choose to be Ollie, my Yoga Cat

How Do You Find Your Happy Place in Strange Times?

Stargazer and Ollie

With so much fear, anger, corruption, killing, prejudice, hatred, sadness, how do you keep going?  How do you nurture your soul so you don’t burst into one of these tyrants we are seeing daily?  How do you stay centered, focused and find your happy place in a world that seems so divided and destructive?  How do you stand up to these injustices and yet maintain your center and core?

We are dealing with the unknown and the known all at once which is a double whammy.  

Knowing what we are feeling and where it is coming from is critical so we don’t cycle downward into destruction and despair in anger, calling on unhealthy coping skills of drinking and eating too much to self medicate and soothe ourselves. 

So many times, we haven’t a clue what we are feeling and bury it to push these feelings away because we want to feel happy and joyful but at a time like we are going through now, it would be crazy if we didn’t have feelings bubbling and rising to the surface.  

 By keeping these primitive feelings of destruction and despair at bay for too long, it will want to express itself somehow unless we allow it to have a voice so at least give voice to it ~ just DON’T act it out.  We live in a society of instant gratification and now we have been forced to live without our usual distractions and comforts which we may have taken for granite and when that is taken away, we may find ourselves in a fight or flight pattern.

There is no better feeling than being happy and euphoric but we have gotten so addicted to these feelings that when something happens to upset the apple cart we can go into denial or rage to keep these feelings at bay. And let’s be honest, we all have these feelings.  We are seeing the fall out of unjustness erupting before our very eyes.  It’s contagious because sitting with it feels so hopeless and powerless but that is actually where we can reign in our power if we can go inside and be quiet calling on our higher power.

Breaking things, screaming obscenities, fighting with each other, looting, stealing etc channel this energy somewhere calling on our primitive childlike lower selves to embark in damage and destruction but who are we ultimately hurting or helping for that matter?  It releases it so we temporarily feel better but that is not long lasting or productive.

It creates more separation and more dis-ease in our bodies and minds with the illusion that we are more different than alike, while the opposite is actually true.  We are human beings that want the same things in life;  basic needs; food, shelter, love, family, equality etc.  Let us remember the cloud and veil that covers that fundamental truth and let’s do our part to donate, send blessings, pick up the phone, speak out but let’s take care of our souls intrinsic needs while we shelter in place and now venture out safely being smart for ourselves and others.

Promise yourselves you will do little things daily to find your happy place whatever it is that day.  Take time to rest, read, dance, workout, hike, meditate, come to your mat, smell the roses, see the beauty because it’s still there waiting for you to notice.  It’s not selfish to take time out, it’s critical so we can have the energy to have our voices heard.  

Do things everyday that fill your heart with joy so you can be part of the solution, not the problem and find peace doing them.

Stargazer and me

As I say this, I’m writing while I lay with my once feral black and white cat, Stargazer, snuggling up to me nudging me for breakfast. I couldn’t feel happier and more grateful.  I am reminded that once she was a street kitty; scared, hiding, injured, and by herself. With love, patience and devotion after 3 years of commitment she is now part of our pack with Ollie, our yogi cat, 2 dogs (one that wanted to eat her and used to chase her) and 6 humans.

If we all have this kind of commitment to our fellow man and reach out and support each other, first starting with ourselves, we can have a world with equality, justice, love and peace one being at a time.  

But remember, start with yourself and find your happy place in the rubble everyday no matter what and ask your higher power to help you.

Where is your happy place?  

Stay Strong!

Have you been Hacked?

Livestream platforms have been a blessing and a curse at least for me anyway.

Until this week, it’s definitely been more of a curse as I try to learn how to use it each week with new issues that show up after resolving one after the other.  I venture to say we are all having challenges unless you are a big techie and have been using it for business for a long time.

As soon as I get one thing figured out, they change something or make it more secure which requires another step for your users to figure out as well.  I don’t know about you, but every time there is a problem with it, I’m certain I did something wrong and never think it could be one of my participants.  In life in general, we either think everything is our fault or it’s everyone else’s fault.  That is a subject for another time, but one that certainly is worth exploring.  

If you are like me and think it’s your fault, it’s anxiety producing and as we know, when we get anxious our thoughts and wires cross and we can’t think clearly.  At least I can’t.  My heart begins racing and I start pressing buttons and my mind freezes.  I am quickly catapulted back to my high school days when test anxiety took over and my mind went blank.  And there I sat humiliated and embarrassed, frozen and then I’d hear the dreaded bell ring with a blank page and another F.  

Each class I teach on Zoom, I start early, I have all of my settings written down and there are a lot of them between bluetooth, music, sharing a screen, pinning, muting or unmuting, enabling chat, WiFi connection etc.  and I’m not even using chat or sending someone to a breakout session.  

As I’m understanding more and feeling more confident it usually goes fairly well but the connection can be weak and now that I have a 50 ft cord plugged directly into my router and computer, I know that it’s not me and am starting to see it’s someone else’s issue but you still have to know enough to help them.  

People say well that’s not your problem but if you know what it’s like to try to navigate a world you know nothing about and didn’t grow up in, you want to help people with this struggle. Besides, if they can’t get on, why are they going to come back next time?  I also applaud the aging community, me included, to even attempt to navigate this system. KUDOS TO US!

Teaching Yoga and Fitness classes online presents even more challenges in finding the right headset and allowing music which isn’t a great system in Zoom yet so if you are having trouble, IT’S NOT YOU.  And then everyone’s hearing is different and some like it, and some don’t.  Some say it’s too loud, others say, it’s not loud enough.  The list goes on and on.  

As a host you try to find a headset that pairs easily, can be adjusted, won’t fall off and is comfortable.  I’ve had about 5 so far including Airbuds, some bone activator one, Beats 3, Jabra Elite, a microphone plugged in and now I’m going to try Beats Pro.  Jabra so far is great but I can only handle an hour comfortably after adjusting all of the ear inserts.  

The other thing right now, is that so many people are on Zoom, sometimes it’s a network issue especially if others in your home are on meetings as well.  Don’t you wish we bought stock in it?!!!!!

So, back to hacking.  They have been good to stay on top of informing us that we needed to protect our settings to avoid hackers when they found out about it.  Unfortunately, they didn’t have this figured out ahead of time but I suppose how can you project these things when sales increased by the droves.  

It was hard enough for me to get on in the first place so I sure didn’t want to make my life harder than it was or my clients, so I left it open ended.  And besides the feedback I got from my tech savvy kids was, “who’s gonna hack you”.  

As I was teaching Yoga this past week, I knew exactly who was coming plus or minus a couple pending people and then a few minutes into teaching an unrecognizable number came up.  

I said Hi to (the number) and I got no response.  

Hmmmm…. a hacker?  Who would hack little ole me like my kids told me?”

I mean seriously, I have a following but I’m not Sean Corn, Janet Stone or Shiva Ray where you would expect or even invite the more the merrier.  At first I thought nothing of it but then I started wondering what exactly they would be hacking. My moves (all are borrowed in someway anyway), so that’s ok.  My music?  Have at it.  My people in the class? So perhaps they could get their information off my screen and advertise to?  Ewe, I thought, I hope not!  Then the dreaded feeling of being invaded and literally going through and pulling off all of my information stored in my computer.  We all know people who have been taken to the cleaners.  As a matter of fact my tenants father who owns a very high end dry cleaning business was completely hacked and almost lost his whole life savings.

All the while, I continued teaching with this added distraction in my mind, as if I didn’t  have enough already with my cat Ollie or Star coming on screen, or my dog deciding to bark.  In my Tuesday morning class, my husky shepherd, Hunter came in and took a big gulp of my coffee when I was teaching.  One night my husband who was using my ipad accidentally shared his screen and he knows nothing about screen sharing.  

We all know yoga is about staying in the present moment and breathing matching your breath to movement and dropping the next moment but we also know that it takes a lot of brain power and is draining, to keep dropping all of that, stay present and at the same time navigate how to adjust, change and fix the issue if possible. 

My daughter chatted to this person and said “Hi” without any response.  

At the end of class I said “it was great having you in class and now if you want to join us to have a toast ( It’s our S.I.P. UnWine🍷d Wednesday Yoga class), please do.  Still nothing.

HACKED!  There is this feeling of violation, worry, fret when something like this happens to you and it caught me by surprise.  I mean who actually would do that, what could they steal if anything and what did they want?  No sense wasting time on worrying about something you can do nothing about but I like to get to the bottom of things when I can, so I put an email out to all of those I had added or had requested an invite, to see if they by chance couldn’t get in and said we missed them.  The funny thing is one regular couldn’t get on at all.  

All of the responses I got were “sorry I couldn’t end up making it” for one reason or another.  Ok I thought, we were hacked and my daughter confirmed that it was a number that was out of state and saw that it was possibly a spam number.

I responded to each one saying “sorry I missed you and hope to see you next week”.  Then I said, “thanks for letting me know as I’m trying to figure out if I’ve been hacked or not because there was a weird number on my screen”.

Confirmed…. Hacked… Ugh, do I need to change all of my settings, passwords etc?  So, I started down that path.

Finally after a few days, I received a message from a dear friend that said and I quote;

“Busted! Yes, that was me on your Zoom, hoping to show up incognito! I was packing and moving around right before I left for Carmel, and I did sign into your yoga class on my phone. I wanted to just connect and check out your class, and thought I would just be one of lots of folks in the class. And I thought I could hide out and come and go as I please. Definitely was not ready to be seen in a class, and since I was moving around, wasn’t able to respond.  The number that shows up, I’m not sure where that comes from. It’s not my phone #.  You are so in tune! I didn’t expect you to ask who the number was? Some of us want to hide out.” 

So the good news is I wasn’t hacked thank goodness and following through put my mind at ease so I didn’t have to go down the rabbit hole or worry.  

In the meantime, I will set passwords and read all of the information Zoom sends me, listen to my inner voice and not always assume my kids know more than me.  

Have any of you been hacked or do you know?

The Words Will Come!


I sit staring at the blank page with jumbled thoughts.  

I could write about meditation, health, fitness, the pandemic and of course racism but the words have been spoken and when we are in such shock and searching for justice, or fighting to be heard in a noisy world, there is a despondency and apathy that can invade your spirit.  Fragments of a poem are the only thing that I find remotely possible but who wants to read unfinished thoughts or write them for that matter.

We all get writer’s block so we just let our fingers do the walking, emptying out the spaces of our mind to flush out what is behind the words and open our heart to see what wants to be expressed, if anything.

Perhaps it is apathy or hopeless despair, trying to sift through the sand to find grains of wisdom. It’s dark and cold;  depression?  I just want to hole up and throw the covers over my head and wait for all of it to end and joy to fill my weary bones. Ugh, groundhog day…..again.

 I used to have a dream that there would be a moment where all beings everywhere had this wake up call all at once.  There was a loud noise and then the words of a higher power, said ”Stop, what are you doing this moment,  Drop your weapons, ego and righteousness and love each other, that’s all there is”.  And as if by magic the voice was heard and we rejoiced together in euphoria and we recognized the oneness that existed instead of the separateness;  And came together in acceptance and peace. 

I have been told this is magical thinking and maybe it is but I will continue this dream and hold it in my heart and actions until the end of time.  I will not succumb to violence even in my rage and sadness.  I will hold my head high and low at times breathing deeply and forgive and heal until I have the strength to lift it and stand once again to take flight.  

  • I will always hold the torch silently and loudly where I can find my light to ignite my spirit. 
  • I will always stand for justice and honor peoples rights separating government from social stances, even when that’s not how our system works.
  • I will always see gray where we can honor each other’s differences as I fight to share mine.
  • I will always use kind words over destructive ones that separate and apologize when I slip up and don’t.
  •  I will try not to lecture but listen beyond words. 
  •  I will fight for our rights and human injustices and stand up for a better future where we can live in equality and build a better future.  
  • I will use my moments to look internally so I can see where I need to heal, forgive, let go, be kinder, stronger, take a stance, speak up and shut up. But I also know as long as we have a human race, there will be bickering, there will be greed, there will be people who take advantage of the system and have a pity party and choose to be victims of their circumstances instead of digging out and doing their part to change their life.  It’s easier for some to blame than to take responsibility but until they do, they will reap what they sow.

I am blessed and I don’t forget that I am lucky to be born where I was, at the time I was, but it did not come without a lot of searching, investigating, clearing out debris and sometimes I felt like I was being eaten alive and permeated by intrusive thoughts and demons haunting me.  But I didn’t back down, I looked in and healed those wounds, real or imagined.

 As long as we are on earth, I’m sad to say, we will continue to have violence and killing and that is NOT to say it is ok.  IT IS NEVER OK!  It is simply to point out when we think this is worse than it’s ever been, might we remember history: The Civil Right Movement, World War 2, The Great depression etc. to remind ourselves that history repeats itself and we are fighting again for causes we thought we abolished but are still very much alive.  Does it sicken us?  Sure it does, but we will fight the good fight and stay strong and speak out demanding justice and equality.  

Earth is a training ground for our next dimension and we must be ready to hear the call.  

So stand up to injustice, speak your opinion, be an example first to yourself and then others who will model these truths.  

We will not back down from these atrocities and let our spirits get beaten down but we will not put our boxing gloves on and fight either, creating more separation and damage.  .  

Instead, we will sit in the void, staring at our paper;   Blank Slate~ Tabula Rasa shaking our heads, feeling the pain of our brothers and sisters, and hold ourselves gently and lovingly, until we have words to speak again and they flow through our hand from pen to paper, so we can share them with the world.

Stay Strong and Stay Well.

Namaste, 

Cindy

The Sun Rises

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The sun rises in the darkest of times peeking it’s ray of hope and sunshine
reminding us that spirit has a lot to teach us.

The clouds and storms wash away all of our dismantled parts so we can see the truth of our heart connections.

The moon rises illuminating the truth of our existence that we are all one
where we return to our true nature;  love and light.

 Teaching us patience and resilience, so we can rise stronger and healthier for all mankind, where we hold hands once again and sing in harmony. 

Stay Strong and Keep the faith……. we will be ok.

Breathing and Yoga During the Pandemic

Hi Yoginis,

(written 5 weeks ago)

Frozen in our patterns and thoughts, moving in a similar pattern that is constructed by our minds day in and day out. But we are not what our minds tell us or even what we perceive. 

 We are beyond words and our truth lies in the void of that emptiness where we begin anew every single day.  

What are you birthing on this new day 

And with who or where do you want to travel

Life in our new normal with the pandemic and trying to learn platforms when I’m a pen a paper gal is down right tough. Just ask my kids and assistant.

On Wednesday nights class I had help, even though my tech team was at the the lake helping remotely.  I was set up and ready to go early and felt very confident since things had been getting better each week.  

However, I couldn’t hear anything come through the speaker and it doesn’t help that I’m half deaf.  After trying everything to get the sound to work, my only option was to move to my iPad after I bounced so many people in and out inadvertently and I’m so sorry, some of you couldn’t get on at all.  

It was a beautiful night but it continued to get windier and windier which made my voice harder to hear. Then the screen blew over, and one participant was accidentally sharing his screen and to top it off, I was running out of power.

The talk I planned on Breathing and Yoga and the Pandemic, fell on deaf ears since you may not have heard any of it, but I have to say, I was grateful for the message I planned because it helped me stay grounded and center myself so I could withstand the frustration, embarrassment and panic I felt when all of these interruptions and annoyances continued.  

I thought “I can’t do this again:  This is the last time I will ever teach in this forum again.” And then I took a breath and realized I had written this most likely for myself so I could drop all thought and just be present.

I was frozen and I held my breath as we do when we are in the fight or flight mode.

As I felt this I paused and took a deep breath.  

Our very first breath as babies were one of the hardest breaths we will ever take and our last breath.

In the womb we were cozy and warm with our mothers amniotic fluid surrounding us and our nourishment and breath came from our connection with our mother through our umbilical cord.  Fluid filled our lungs and upon our entry to the world our breath was replaced by air as the fluid left our lungs and was reabsorbed into our bodies and excreted cellularly and transferred out and excreted.  This is a rather shocking experience for the body and often when babies are born they are given a little swat to get this transference of oxygen to start.  

 It’s quite a complex and jarring so it’s no wonder that we often hold our breath during the day especially under stressful situations.  The body remembers everything and holds tension patterns in the tissues and we have to constantly train ourselves to Breathe which sounds so easy but if it were that easy, we wouldn’t have to take classes to teach us how to breath.

6 weeks into the pandemic, it is important now more that ever to keep breathing, (yes, with a mask if you are outside with others or shopping).

Stay present in this moment and continue to find ways to stay in the NOW.

People are viewing this in a mirage of different ways which is interesting to look at and examine.

Some are in the camp that it is over which allows some to relax, while others cringe at that thought.

Some feel it’s a political stunt. Others, that this will last for the next few years until we have an immunization for it.  

No matter where you stand, it’s easy to find yourself holding your breath hearing the ongoing bombardment.

Yoga is a practice of doing Asanas (Movements) combined with Breath (Pranayama in Sanskrit).

Pantajali was a sage that wrote the Veda Sutras in 1500 BCE.

The Yoga Sutras is a book that has the principles of Yoga outlining the 8 Limbs of Yoga and Pranayama is the 4th of the 8 principles. 

Pranayama is regulation of the breath and is the formal practice of controlling the breath, which is the source of our prana, or vital life force. Together the objective is to still the inflictions of the mind.  

3 PART BREATH

There are many different breathing techniques to help still the inflictions of the mind.

One of the first breaths Yoga teachers and students learn is the 3 Part Breath. Of all the breathing techniques yoga has to offer, Three-Part Breath is one of the simplest, and yet most powerful. 

It’s called Dirgha Pranayama in Sanskrit and helps clear the mind, is grounding and relaxing and can be done on and off the mat.  

Simply breath into your Abdomen with on hand on your belly and continue filling up your diaphragm with one hand on your rib cage and expand the breath to the top on your chest where your clavicle meets.  You can hold the breath for a count of 6 or vary the length of your breaths and holds or simply just breath.  

On your exhale breath you simply allow your clavicle and chest to drop as your diaphragm releases air and finally your abdomen drawing your belly button into your spine.

5 weeks ago Little did we know, we would be watching a man being killed with a knee on his neck by a policeman when our officers are suppose to be there to protect us. No one stopped this when resuscitation is required by law.

We all bared witness to hearing George Floyd’s last words “I CAN’T BREATHE” and then saw the footage of him handcuffed, unconscious and dead. We also watched another black man, Ahmad Arbery, being gunned down by 3 white men just weeks before that.

This inhumane injustice has tortured us, wounding our psyches and souls. We are still in shock that we are still racist and predudice and this injustice needs to change. We need to do better and stand up, petition, make our voices heard, put a line in the sand, end racism, donate, stay strong and be bearers of light NO MATTER WHAT!

Out last breath should be one where we are are sheltered and escorted to the other side, loved and cared for not left gasping for our lives.

Black Lives Matter!

Now more than ever we are challenged to do better and come to our mat where we can be held, where we can breath and let go of the grief, anger and tears that have taken our bodies hostage.

Come to the mat with us and open your heart to the goodness that is all around you, where you matter, life matters and we weep together and have a moral compass. An eye for an eye won’t bring back these men but we can keep their spirits alive in our heart and have our voices heard where we can hold light and love so that their lives don’t go in vain and justice can be served.

Keep Breathing and Stay Strong!

STAY STRONG IN LIGHT

S.I.P, UnWine🍷d Wednesday Yoga 6/3/2020

Rage, tears, broken hearts, injustice
No words when your heart has been ripped out
 Everything we value has been reduced to silencing and killing

The streets are filled with noise, broken glass, bleeding hearts
We can’t breath and if one can’t breathe
We all can’t breath.

Silenced forever with no remorse, no ability to stand for justice
Anger and destruction looking to dispel the pain
Calling other squashed souls to rise and be heard

Injustice building upon hatred and racism
Bubbling Temperatures rise, like making molasses
Sticky, heated, oozing out of our pours, wounds seeping open

Violence breeds violence
Fear breeds fear
Love opens our hearts to truth

We stand together to reflect the light 
Standing up, and staying strong, we will not be silenced
But we will not destroy in rage and be part of the problem

We Spread light, We are Light, We are Love
We pray for healing and change that reflects our true nature
We stand united not divided, when the light blows out, it illuminates us all

WHY GOALS MATTER

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Life is always a journey of prioritizing what is important to you, fully engaged and present with an attainable step by step plan so you can live your highest purpose

-Cindy 


Happy Almost Summer and 11 weeks of surviving the pandemic.

I hope you and your loved ones are doing well.

It’s been a crazy time for sure which has brought all of us different insights.

I wanted to share my thoughts on Why Goals Matter during the Pandemic.

While it seems like it should be the last thing on our mind, I personally think it’s really important because we can get lost in the abyss aimlessly wandering around or move into unhealthy patterns.

My goal this year was to have our newsletter out Every Month on the 1rst. This is our 6th month in and not only have we gotten them out on time but have created some other little videos to help keep people sane and fit.

YAY!

My husband and son don’t understand why I need to write a newsletter at this time since I’ve been so busy with Zoom and trying to figure out that platform etc. I think it seems to them my writing is not providing a service  and I already have enough on my plate which I could use to be more productive.  They may be right but I do it because……..

1) I like to write and it gives me a forum for that outlet.

2) If I can be of service to just one person, then I have accomplished my objective.

One thing I have learned in my life, is that when I do what I set out to do, regardless of circumstances, I strengthen my will power.  This gives me great satisfaction and builds on other goals that I have for myself, whatever they may be.

I do hope they have been helpful but if at any time it’s too much please let me know as it’s meant to be of service not bombardment.

So, why should it matter at a time like this that we keep our goals?

First of all, let me just say I am particularly blessed and grateful because everyone in my family is healthy, myself included, so I’ve been able to continue seamlessly.  Well, not without some bumps and challenges as you may have read about or witnessed in one of my classes( oh the learning cure), but thankfully we have all been well.

If you are infected, going through a health crisis, a front line worker, had an unexpected accident, got laid off work, working triple time, or a family member or friend is ill, of course everything needs to come to a halt for the time being.

Some of us were in shock with staying home, lay offs etc the first week and our regular patterns were thrown off with late night T.V. videos, games etc.

While this is an understandable derailment, it’s important to shift this before it becomes a habit that is hard to change.

With 11 weeks in, it’s time to get back on track so we don’t abandon ourselves completely during this time. When our schedules get off kilter our systems get thrown off and if we aren’t getting the sleep we need, that alone can make it difficult to function optimally.

There is something freeing in letting schedules go, but soon healthy regimes we have created can be eroded by allowing this mini vacation to turn into an extended one.  Let’s face it, everyday is groundhog day right now and it’s hard to keep track of time, even if you are working.   If there isn’t much on your plate, it’s easy to let things slip through the cracks and if you are in work overload, both can result in dropping out our self care that is vital and deeply nurturing.  Cheap thrills can’t sustain a healthy lifestyle and going on too long will result in weight gain, stress, tension, depression etc.

Either way,  self care is critical for all of us particularly now to keep our immune system and serotonin levels at their optimum level.

Schedules also give us a sense of purpose and meaning.

Redefine what and how you spend your time and what is important to you on a deep level.

Most likely many of the items on your New Year’s Goals were about taking care of yourself through exercise and daily health regimes.  If yours were to travel more or make more money, that won’t be happening any time soon so it’s best to focus your attention on things you actually do have control over so you can feel proud of that.

Watch virtual travel for now with travel plans in the distant future and look at how you can optimize your financial future for later.

Do things every day that make you feel healthy, vibrant and alive.

Get out in nature even if only in your backyard and walk, stretch, workout, plant a garden (mine is thriving for the first time~ see Geri’s Gardening Article below), write, draw, read, meditate, play hopscotch, board games, games online, puzzles and find hobbies you never knew would attract you.  Limit your social media and phone time as this can be a way to judge and compare yourself and is a huge time sync.

Remember to make a daily list of what you’re grateful for, what you are learning about yourself and to send blessings to those in need.

Blessings,

Cindy