Thank you so much once again to Jason Gotlib for his spectacular photo and his beautiful hopeful quote.
In celebration, light, love, hope, unity, blessings, prayers for all of us; no matter what color our skin, religious beliefs, gender, sexual preference or age. Thanks so much reading and liking (if you do of course), commenting and or sharing!
Welcome to Fri-Yay Funday Collab post When Heaven Meets Hell!
Once every so often your path crosses with someone that you might never be friends with. You are from complete opposite sides of the coin, or are you? You can’t explain it but there is sheer delight in the irreverent, and light heartness of deep issues that the other person would say “It’s not that deep”. They make you laugh even though you might not comepletely get their “warped sense of humor” (no judgement there 🤣), or making fun of issues of importance. And they don’t get your esoteric heavenly ways. Men are from Mars and Woman are from Venus. We all know this is true. In this case, He is from Hell and I of course, am from Heaven. 🤣 🔥😇
Can they ever meet in the middle and find equal playing ground?
Step out of your box whereever you stand and have some light hearted fun. We’ve been locked up so long we may have begun to take ourselves too seriously.
Who are you?
The age old question.
I am the wind beneath your wings
So, what’s a nice girl like me doing in a place like this hanging out with you? I was minding my own business doing my job helping people mend their wings so they can fly again and then you came along. I have an important job being an angel and don’t have time for demented souls like you. It’s a full-time job turning damaged goods into worthy ones. And then word gets out that you are so good at it, you put your shingle out and call it heaven. Floating in the clouds is fun for a while, wearing your white robe and Halo and drinking good wine. Not rot gut thunderbird for me, I’ll leave that for you in the lowland. I get the goblets out and say “drink, this is my blood and you will have eternal life and be free”.
Everyone wants freedom but next thing you know they’ve drunk the life right out of you and you’re floating in the Red Sea. So you pour a little more so you can drown their sorrows and yours from the purgatory of YOU. It’s a thankless job but someone’s gotta do it and it sure as hell isn’t gonna be you. You sit in your solitary confinement, laughing the pee out of people, farting, making jokes, raking someone over the coals while you sharpen your horns and stick, ready with a swift prick. Oh to be a prick. Prick you. I just wanna be you for a day. Even Fairy Godmother’s need a time out. Their wings get tired and they get sick of nursing these poor souls back to life.
I think it’s great that people try to be you for a day. Sometimes I pretend to be normal but it gets boring so I go back to being myself. I’ve put a lot of thought into it and I don’t think being an adult is going to work for me. So the only way I will gladly swap bodies is if it’s with a kid. There’s nothing about being a kind old lady that appeals to me. Everyone comes to me for food and advice, two things I hate sharing above all. Why would I be inclined to give you food just because I’m old and motherly looking? Although if you want bad advice, you can catch me at the pub, I’ll be there all night long dishing it. The worst part is, you were born on a leap year, so I have to wait four years to celebrate my damn birthday?
I could never live in a shoe so I jumped to light speed so I could never be old. A Genie in a bottle, my wish is your command but only once every 4 years. The rest of the time I’m eternal youth, celebrating all year, cuz I’ll always be younger than you. Young at heart, we agree there, but spending too much time in the pub eating grub, surely ages you more than anything else. Just ask your liver. Too many kids and animals so what else was I going to do, so I whine. If I go missing, look for me on a wine bottle. Don’t let my kids know though cuz they’ll drink every bottle and then I’ll never be found. But then maybe that’s not so bad. Dust me off every 4 years and I’ll meet you at the pub but I’m not holding court with a bunch of drunks. I’ll never make it to 29 so I can’t waste my time.
I’ll be honest when I say that this sounds like the best way to live. What is a life worth living if it’s not on the edge? We’re here for a good time not a long time so we have to make the most of every second of the day. If you think nobody cares that you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments. If I ever get missing, please follow my kids. They can find me no matter where I try to hide. Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most. As the days draw to a close, I am constantly reminded of the insignificance of my existence. The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. And that’s on period.
We finally agree. No one makes it out alive so we may as well have a good time. A long ride sounds like a road to nowhere. Does anyone even know what day it is anymore? Or should we care?! As for me, I’m living on the back 9 with all of the comfort stations. The grass is always greener, but be careful what you wish for and watch out for the dog poop. Oops… My mama said there were gonna be days like these. We have to milk each moment for what it’s worth and not cry over spilled milk. It’s all mind over matter. If you don’t mind it doesn’t matter. So no worries about losing yours. The cow jumped over the moon, the little dog barked, the pig squealed and the kids ran away with the wine.
Hell……………….? Are you there?
Heaven can wait; What do you say?
I’d say, that was a hella Fun Friday!!!
I do hope you enjoy this collaboration! This is off the beaten path of my usual arena and it was soooo much fun. If you would like to see more of these please let me know and thanks as always for reading, liking (if you do of course), commenting and or sharing. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and remember if you don’t like it, the devil made me do it 🔥🤣!!!!
It’s Move It Monday so let’s do this. I’ve got a few tips here for you and then I want to share the Interview that Yvette from Priorhouseinvited me to do in December. Thank you again Yvette. She has a wonderful site so please do visit her.
I know a lot of you started out gangbusters with a plan on January 4th. Take note, I didn’t say January 1st because I’ve been in the industry too long to know that ain’t gonna happen unless you have exercise in place already. If you are one of the few that started, kuddos to you! We all know the best time to start is NOW but if you are like most people I know, you really won’t start until February and workout equipment becomes a coat rack soon enough. Don’t let that happen to you!
Start Today January 11th with some easy steps. The junk outta be almost gone and if it isn’t freeze it if you trust yourself not to go digging in after it or THROW IT OUT!!!!
If you need your why (we all need one~ soul search). Your why has to be deeper and truly imortant to you, to keep you motivated.
Here are 5 reasons you need to get to it:
1. WEIGHT CONTROL: Helps to lose fat and build muscle
2. KEEPS YOU HEALTHY: boosts your immune function
3. ENERGY: boosts serotonin levels and oxygen flow
5. LONG-TERM HEALTH: Lowers cholesterol, heart function etc.
Here’s your beginning workout for the year.
Ready or Not: Here we go!
This is easy peasy so you’ll have NO EXCUSES not to Move It!
Get your workout shoes on, dust them off an walk to the mailbox and back. Go a little further 3- 4 days a week and gradually work towards daily walks. Work your way up to 30 minutes in the next couple of weeks. Too cold to walk outside? Jog or walk in place, go up and down the stairs, turn on a video, go to one of my Youtubes or anyone elses for that matter and start with 10 min and build up from there.
Ready to take it to the next level?
Follow the workout Bombay Ficus put out last week that is great and requires No Equipment. It’s AWESOME and I’m going to use it next week when I start back to teaching. Thank you for sharing it with us.
Today I want to share the Priorhouse Interview with blogger Cindy Georgakas.
How did this interview come about? I met Cindy when she was featured on Kally’sMiddle Me and was inspired by her positive energy. The other thing that stood out was how she has been in the health and fitness area since the 1980s. This level of expertise and understanding of the human body is impressive. She also brings joy to the blogosphere.
My favorite post from Cindy’s blog (so far) is “I’ve got your back” with some excellent tips for spine/posture health, sitting tips, and helpful stretches.
Cindy, Thanks so much for saying yes to an interview. Can you tell us some of your history and what you do?
Thank you so much for inviting me, Yvette. It is my pleasure to be here.
I am a Fitness and Life Coach, Personal Trainer, Group Ex Teacher teaching Yoga and bootcamp, Craniosacral and Massage Therapist, Reiki Master, and a Music-as-Medicine Facilitator. I also have a team of therapists and teachers that generally work with me, but due to Covid, we are on hold with that piece of our practice.
Whew…. You might be asking, “How does one person do all of those things?”
The short answer is that when you have been doing this work for as long as I have, diverse pathways continue to emerge and you trust and then go where you are called. I’ve been in the field for 35+ years (that makes me sound a little younger, lol), and I have been regularly practicing right here in Woodside, California (40 miles south of San Francisco) where I was born.
My blog, Uniquely Fit, was born out of my passion for fitness with the premise that every person is unique, different, and each individual’s needs must be honored. Life is meant to be shared and I hope that my blog posts provide some pearls of wisdom and Aha! moments that give meaning to your day; perhaps a chuckle, something to ponder, growth, light, insight, and joy.
Cindy, An interesting thing I took away from your interview on Middle Me was how you started your coaching and health/fitness practice around the same time as Jane Fonda. This stood out to me because the first aerobics class I ever did was with a Jane Fonda cassette tape in 1987 – which started with something like – “You want to have your running shoes on because you won’t want to stop and put them on during the session.” – and lines like, “Get those knees up there.” – haha – So reading that parallel life connection with Jane Fonda was cool. How does your career parallel to her stuff and anything else you want to expound on with this – ?
Interesting question, Yvette – and first, that is such a fun Jane Fonda memory!
I wasn’t an activist or actor like Jane Fonda, but I did perform in a dance comedy group in San Francisco in my 20’s for a few years before opening my studio. As a Recreational Therapist who struggled with my weight, I saw this as a tremendous opportunity to open when Jane Fonda opened hers. I shared her love of fitness and dance and staying in shape, which is what we had in common. Her studio was in S.F. and I opened mine about 20 minutes south of the city in San Mateo, Ca. Fitness studios were popping up all over our area at the time. Classes were one hour consisting of a warm up, waist work, arms, aerobics, gloor, abdominals, legs, hips, thighs and buttocks ending with a stretch cool down. We used those same lines, “knees up”, ”reach”, “higher”, “squeeze.” We also had a lot of “whoo hoos” and cheering to keep everyone motivated while using mostly body weight and dance moves. Those were fun days and I employed the BEST instructors.
Cindy, do you have any tips for the readers on balancing work and family life?
Take good care of yourself first and foremost, which is easier said than done.
Remember you are not Superwoman or Superman. You are human and you need time for yourself as well.
Make a schedule and stick to it and plan in time for the unexpected, much the same way as having a money fund for an unexpected event.
Create a support network as it takes a village to stay strong and fortified. My mom and step dad were AMAZING parts of my support system! Before I decided to get pregnant again, I would ask my mom, “Are you ready for another grandbaby?” Without her, I would NEVER have had more children. Now my mothers asks, “When is someone going to get married and have kids so I can be a Great Grandma?” Also, I was fortunate to have a career that allowed me to adapt my hours to my kids’ schedule and I had an incredibly supportive husband; he was as hands on as I was while raising our kids.
Those are great tips and what spoke to me was the reminder that we are not Superwoman or Superman. In today’s culture, we tend to put so many demands on our schedule – busy-busy, go-do – and many forget to rest and decompress. Cindy, can you share wisdom from a life lesson?
I had owned a fitness studio for two years and we started out gang busters in 1981 when we opened. We built it out with beautiful wood floating floors, with electrifying graphics in red and purple, and we had the very best team of teachers – who I trained along with a consultant I hired.
Our location was marginal and I say that to emphasize, Location is EVERYTHING. If you haven’t heard the famous saying, it is “Location, Location, Location” and in the brick and mortar business world it is everything. I wanted to be in Burlingame, just 10 minutes away, which was perfect but I couldn’t get building permits etc.
I was young and naive and had a great following, but we started out with six classes a day, which was way too much with overhead costs. I ended up giving a lot of free classes and one thing I learned is that people need to value what you give them.
Cindy, I know what you mean about “not valuing” free things. Sometimes free means “disregard.” For example, we once heard about a community center that had people tossing free, entire hamburgers and full drinks into the trash. Rather than giving those items away for free, they started to charge a quarter for hamburgers and drinks, and there was less waste.
Yes. When something is free, people usually do not value it. Also, at that time, I had my first baby and my commitment and time constraints started shifting. As instructors didn’t show up, I had to get certified in more and more classes to assure the show would go on, which was stressful. We were in the red and struggling. The writing was on the wall but this was my first baby, so it was tough to let it go. Finally, we decided to sell the business, which was heartbreaking – but the business was unsustainable. It turned out that the new owners ran an illegitimate massage parlor, which we had no idea about until they were paddy-wagoned out a year later.
At the time, the whole thing was devastating but it turned out to be the best thing ever and the increase of income was insurmountable. Traveling to people’s homes and them coming to me, was much more lucrative without the overhead of a storefront business.
As the 2020 year is winding down and some folks might be thinking about health goals for the coming year -do you have health and wellness tips to offer?
I would say:
Don’t wait for 2021 to start, DO IT NOW.
Take small steps to build habits and instill more long lasting health benefits.
Do some kind of activity daily for a min 30 min. Aim for an hour but if you can’t do that, do 10 minute increments. Cardiovascular activity is important for your heart health. Think walk, run, bike, dance etc.
Do some kind of strength training either with your own body weight or small or medium to large weights 2-3 days a week, and do stretching everyday if possible.
Meditate or do some breathework daily. I love Yoga and Tai Chi because they are moving meditation. I also like to do a daily sitting practice of about 15 minutes to train myself to do nothing, which is no easy feat.
Music and chanting are also wonderful gifts for the soul.
And where on your blog should they go for more information if they wanted to connect with you?
I blog monthly about fitness on my blog site and add videos.
Thank you so much for your time here at Priorhouse blog.
Thank you, again, Yvette, for inviting me to be featured on your invaluable site.
As a Health and Wellness Professional, I am inspired daily by my clients and friends who continue to inspire me to be my best self! One of my favorite parts of blogging is sharing thoughts openly and candidly in support.
To all readers, Remember that “Life is Not a Dress Rehearsal” so do not put off what you want most for what you want now.
My top takeaway was Cindy’s call to action.
Her reminder to NOT put off what you want most and the advice to not wait for 2021 to start is something to consider. Start some new habits “maybe this week” and don’t wait until “after the holidays.”
Start something today.
End 2020 with some Zest.
Sometimes our health and wellness needs have to be addressed right now – no matter what the season. Maybe pick one thing from the list of suggestions and get moving – like do some breathe work – try meditating – or start following Cindy’s blog for some ideas – and especially be sure to check out her “Fri-Yay… Funday!!!”
And this short YouTube wvideo will give you some ideas for giving your body a lift right now – 15 minutes of an investment in you:
Okay- Any notes for Cindy regarding what she shared?
Any photos from the post stand out to you?
Any plans for your health and wellness goals for 2020 – maybe something to start this week??
Or any tips you have for ways we can end 2020 with some zest?
Thanks so much for visiting today and please remember to like (if you do of course), comment and or share. So much appreciation!
Good Morning, Afternoon or Evening… Wherever this finds you on the globe,
My apologies for those of you who received this twice. I somehow tried to schedule it and it accidentally went through and then it disappeared.
I am giving you the option of listening to my video or reading my thoughts I compiled today. Chuck from The Reluctant Poet encouraged me to do so, thanks Chuck. If you don’t know him, please visit his site as he is most gracious in reblogging our work. Also, my Dad suffers from macular degeneration and glaucoma as I know some of you do as well, so this makes it easier to read. I hope you enjoy!
Blessings ❤️ Cindy
Peace is not a place you go when you finally lay at your grave. Peace is accepting right where you are.
It’s found in the depths of your soul, when you sit rocking yourself in the corner, in the midst of chaos. It challenges every aspect of your being, but if you can be gentle with yourself, you can find the corner where there is light in darkness, untouched by shame, sadness and disappointment.
You might be rocked by someone, but still feel alone. You might feel the presence of love through God’s hands, which brings solace to your soul, but you may not believe in God or a higher power, and that’s ok, even if you hear otherwise.
When your heart is punctured and you feel blood dripping down your chest or your head pounds so hard, you think it will explode, can you hold yourself lovingly and graciously, like a mother holds her baby, singing and rocking you in the dark night, to comfort you? If you die in my arms tonight, I will be here while you grieve and take your last breath. If you are keeled over in pain, I’ll rub your back and see you through. If you are standing at the bridge because you can’t go on, surrender and let go while you let the eagle carry you to shore. If your mind is fractured and you’re cracking, let me be your putty to fill you. If drugs and alcohol poison your body, drink the sweet nectar from the honey bees. You might ask but where are you, I can’t see you? I’m here right at your side. I’m the whisper of the wind, the reflection of the trees in the pond, I live inside of you and you in me. I am the top of the mountain on a snowy night that gives you frostbite so you can feel again. I am the sun that shines deeply sending rays of light to heal your wounds.
I am the light of the moon that illuminates your vision, so you can see again. I am the thunder of the night, to jolt you back into reality. When you smell the burnt flesh, bake a loaf of bread instead; break it and eat for nourishment and strength. I will never give up on you and on your last breath, I will breathe in air to carry your soul to everlasting light. I will never leave you, I’m right here at your side. Surrender, let go, you are light, it is your mission and plight.
This was written a couple of weeks ago, when so many dear ones I know are suffering all at one time for different reasons. I wrote this with the hope and truth that no matter where this finds you today, I am holding you in my heart and soul. The power of love can heal you, if you surrender to your shadow side while you hold yourself lovingly. Empty out and feel the love from which you came and are. I am holding the bridge for you to the other side where light and truth reside so keep the faith.
I’m grateful for your visit, liking (if you do of course), commenting and or sharing.
Behind the dark cloud the sun is always there and the clouds are wrapped in cotton candy to hold your tears and fears.
This is to my children and all of us that suffer silently and loudly. I just want you to know that I’m thinking of you as you go through your day no matter how difficult it might be, and let you know I’m sending you love and blessings.
When you are in pain, I too am in pain. I wish I could take whatever you are going through away and make it right. It was easy in your younger days with skinned knees where bactine, a band-aid and hug was all that was needed to send you happily on your way.
Life can’t always prepare you for hard knocks and unexpected tragedies that are out of our control, that bring you to your knees in gut wrenching pain and sadness. I guess I didn’t tell you that part, cuz I wanted to spare you. Some things are just not fair, and it’s not your fault and beleive you me, if I could fix it, I would.
I will be here to listen and to hold your hand and your tears while you go through whatever it is in life, while you find your way. Make sure you hold yourself gently and lovingly, wrapped in cotton candy through the dark hours, while I call in the bees to make honey combs and sweet nectar.
It’s not your fault, remember that, and try not to get so far ahead of yourself, that you are robbed of sleep and forget to enjoy the moments that are good. Stay present and when you are in pain, breath in light and breathe out fear. Angels always beat the devil at the end of the day, so invite as many earth angels and ethereal ones as you can in, to help you ease the pain.
Try not to project too much into the future as your navigate the present, while researching your next steps. This is all easier said than done I know, but the only way out, is through. You can’t side step or skirt the issues so put your big girl/boy pants on, while you stay proactive, examaining your options and don’t let it dominate your day; or find someone to play dominos with.
Build sand castles and sugar blocks like you always have, and when they fall, pick them back up and build your foundation with your footprints in the sand. The sun is just behind the dark cloud, technology is aways improving and prayer never fails. So keep the good book in your pocket and don’t forget to sing a song. A penny in your pocket and and a feather in your cap, reminds you that you are rich beyond measure and have wings to help you fly.
And baby never forget you are strong and resilient but wear a helmet and shin guards when you need them, because life’s gonna give you some hard knocks. It only gives you as much as you can handle, as the saying goes, and you only know that once you’re through it. But have Kleenex and duct tape in your pocket handy, for your tears and to hold you together, while you heal.
And remember to look to the light that is always behind the dark cloud. Don’t forget, you will get kicked to the curb and it’s gonna hurt, but get back in the ring until you win the good fight. Sorry I didn’t tell you all of this; I guess I wanted to spare you, but you know, I’d do it all the same way again. Because one thing I know, is that love heals all, and I know that, because I’m your mama and no one loves you more, except maybe your papa.
Have a lovely day with cotton candy, sugar cubes, duck tape, feathers, a penny in your pocket with angels leading your way. Turn it over to God or whatever higher power you believe in.
I love you,
Please remember to like (if you do of course), comment and or share. With appreciation and always love.
This piece was done by a dear friend / client of mine, Lynn Cornish and greets you upon entry of her home, welcoming visitors, to remind them of what matters most in life. Lynn lives in Portola Valley, California with her 2 dogs Ozzie and Bubba who are the light of her life. Lynn has been painting for 30 years and paints with 20 other artists in a warehouse in Redwood City, California. Her art is sometimes provocative, whimsical and always vivid and bright, capturing the essence of what happens on any given day.
This particular piece “Don’t Confuse Net Worth W/ Self Worth” is inspired by the area in which she lives in Silicon Valley, the dot com capital, where 1 % of the richest population resides. It could be easy to get swept away with power and greed but her message speaks to the heart, reminding us that truly Wealth is Health and not indicative of people’s contentment or happiness.
Lynn knows first hand that wealth does not equal health as her brother Robby suffered with mental illness all of his life. She tried for years to the best of her ability to help him with therapy, programs, housing, finances etc. He lived as rich a life as anyone could have with his serious condition of schizophrenia. He frequented thrift shops often and drove the car she gave him proudly and everyone knew him by name. He told many stories in lucid times and his favorite line was “It’s nothing to write home about” and laughter would fill the air. Everyone still laughs when they talk about this story and although I never met Robby, I feel as though I knew him by the stories that she and her brothers and sister in laws share when they get together in fond memory. Robby had an episode as is often the case with mental health issues that landed him in jail on a 5150 in March of 2015. I personally reassured Lynn that this was a good thing (I know first hand with family members that suffer from mental health issues) because he would now get the help he needed which is most often the case. She was trying to post bail because she was worried sick about him but sadly and tragically he was murdered in jail by his roommate who also suffered mental health issues on St. Patrick’s Day March 17th 2015.
Lynn makes generous donations to mental health organizations along with many other worthy causes.
Mental Health treatment, care and respect for each individual cannot be overemphasized in a world where 1 in 4 suffer from mental health issues and trauma. It does not discriminate and one never knows if or when one of us could be part of this percentage.
Lynn’s house reflects her fun loving, giving and vivacious personality that captivates everyone that comes in contact with her. Her walls are a gallery that infuse happiness and joy while looking at her art and her expansive view of the bay and majestic mountains.
Most days you will find her hiking the hills with the deer, turkeys and extraordinary wild life that are protected in her area.
Here’s Lynn‘s website if you want to check it out, just for fun. I am a HUGE fan and the lucky recipient of piece that hangs in my entry.
The one above is ear marked for another one of her friends but we are all battling her for it or urging her to make a lithograph for our homes as well. If you are interested in that please let her know.
One day when working with Lynn I saw this in her garage and she said she was painting over it because she didn’t like it. I grabbed it so fast it would make your head spin and I LOVE IT. What’s more is my husband and I don’t agree on art at all AND WE BOTH LOVE IT!!! That speaks volumes!!!
Look closely here…. no irreverence intended but even Buddha agrees this year has been F_____. Just keeping with the theme of things from last post. Lol!!!!
As always, thanks so much for reading, liking (if you do of course), commenting and or sharing. I’m most grateful for your time and kindness.
Here’s to our Wealth in Health with Love and Always Laughs,
Wisdom is optional, Aging is not. To be wise you must remain open minded, learn and grow especially as things become more challenging. Staying rigid in belief and thought are reflected in the body. copyright Cindy Georgakas2020
How do we continue to grow in wisdom as we age, especially now in the pandemic with our new normal in place? It makes one question the constructs you have put in place for yourself in life and if you have prepared yourself for the unexpected. Are you able to shift gears and live in what is verses what was, trying to get back to normal as you go about your day that you are not open to the moment?
We all deal with things differently and I for one hit the ground running when my terrain has been shaken or embers threaten my internal world. I train myself daily to be mindful and practice meditation, qigong, Tai Chi etc. I try to stay present so when difficult times happen in my life that require me to find calm and joy in chaos, I can access it. It’s not enough to sit, it is the everyday moments that teach us to put it into action, what we practice and therein lies the work which isn’t as easy as it seems. Practice what we preach as the old antage goes.
Well guys, the fires have finally hit our home indirectly. There is smoke in the air with the threatening of lightning and heat so we are on alert but we are okay for now. I mentioned my 86 year old father and his girlfriend who is 90 were more at risk and they indeed had to evacuate their house the other night due to the fires since they are about 6 miles away. I don’t think they were threatened as much as they wanted the roads closed since it’s a windy 2 lane thoroughfare and the fire fighters need access to the areas behind them. If the winds do shift, embers could hit one of their at least 200 trees on the property and with a shake roof, it could quickly turn to no way out.
My Dad couldn’t reach me right away because I was in a session the other night when the fire department knocked on his door to evacuate them. When I called back he said he was was disappointed in me. I had talked to him earlier for about 45 minutes and everything seemed ok but I did say he could come here if something happened and temporarily moved in with us.
It cut to the core because I am always here for my family no matter what and for the life of me, I’m not sure what he was so disappointed about yet, but I have lived my whole life for his approval. I thought I healed that wound but here I am once again facing this feeling of sadness, anger and pain.
We picked him up and he is staying here until things are safe and clear to return. I get to practice being present with my feelings, his and forgive but right now it’s cordial and chilly which is good since it’s so blazing hot outside. He can’t see with macular degeneration and glaucoma and is bone on bone so is in pain a lot of the time. He had a stroke 2 years ago after elective heart valve replacement and I was there for him every step of the way. It’s really sad to see your robust father that was so strong and athletic decline. He needs help to accommodate his aging body which he refuses to acknowledge which is frustrating because he will be going blind and won’t make choices while he still can and I will be forced to make them for him. He lives up the hill 20 minutes from us and we need to work full time to make ends meet which makes response time a problem.
I continue to look for the lesson and silver lining while we acknowledge this internal struggle for all of us living under one roof with our 2 adult children as well who moved in after the pandemic. We have had to learn how to navigate and move into an adult relationship together changing our old structure of our adult child relationship which has been a gift but not without a lot of discussion and falling back into old patterns.
I am struck by other countries where living together is the norm and they are interdependent on each other. Some of the millenials actually want to move but don’t want to upset their parents. When we were in Bali, we were so struck by everyone living together and asked the families how they manage it. They looked at us so perplexed and couldn’t understand why we didn’t live with our family members. I remember growing up and I couldn’t wait to go away to college at 18 and move out and I never looked back. Things were pretty rocky at home and I needed to move for my own salvation and in America that was the norm.
Now, here we are and 2 of our 4 kids are living with us and we are all navigating this uncharted territory which hasn’t been easy, but finding the benefits while managing the complexities of the financial burden and help with daily chores. America is now catching up and finding that 55% of the 22-35 years olds are living in fact do live at home and I’m sure that number will rise with the pandemic in place until who knows when.
But let’s be clear, this is a challenging time and as I age I find it difficult to live with anyone anymore, if I am to be completely honest. And I would venture to say, they find it difficult to live with me as well.
Having my Dad here is a deeper opportunity for letting go of trying to please someone so near and dear to my heart even though I know that I am not there at the moment. Our days are numbered and short. Life is fragile. I won’t get these moments and days back. I have a choice. What do I want? Will I choose to sit with this and stew and let it consume me and miss the opportunity of growth or will I let it go and clear the air? No doubt he was scared since I’m his lifeline.
I am reminded of the words of Don Miguel Rodriguez in his book The 4 Agreementswhich I listed below.
The Four Agreements:
Be Impeccable with your word.
Don’t take anything personally.
Don’t make assumptions
Always do your best
I am going to go to my mat now and pray to open my heart and release my ego of righteousness and illusion.
I will go in and invite him for a chat. I’m not sure where it will take us exactly but I will go forward, not backward in time or division.
It’s time to practice what I preach and It is so much easier when I am facilitating a Life Coaching session, rather than living one.
And this my friends is how you coach yourself.
Have a blessed day and remember What someone thinks of you is NOT your Business, so don’t take it personally. But don’t hold on to it, you only hurt yourself.
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